From addiction issues to his marriage to Kourtney Kardashian, nothing is off-limits in Travis Barker‘s new documentary.
Travis Barker: Louder Than Fear, now streaming on Hulu, follows the musician “as he embarks on a raw and redemptive journey, which started after surviving a devastating plane crash that nearly took his life,” according to the official synopsis.
Over the course of nearly a decade, Barker, 50, reflects on his childhood, his rise to stardom and the challenges he faced along the way. Blink-182 band members Mark Hoppus and Tom DeLonge also make appearances, along with the late Taylor Hawkins, Questlove, Lil Wayne, Machine Gun Kelly, Yungblud, Tommy Lee and more.
Keep scrolling for the most shocking revelations from Barker’s documentary:
Breaking Down Travis Barker’s Fear of Flying
The documentary, which features police footage from the night of Barker’s 2008 plane crash, starts by showing how the drummer traveled solo to Europe on a nine-day cruise aboard the Queen Mary 2.
The musician says he’s struggled with a fear of flying since he was a child.
Revisiting Travis Barker’s Childhood
While discussing his childhood in Fontana, California, Barker reveals his dad lived separately from the family after cheating on his mother. Barker’s father eventually returned to their lives when his mother got sick. (Barker’s mother was diagnosed with Sjögren syndrome and died shortly before he started high school.)
“Before my mom passed, we found out my dad was in a relationship with another woman, which made it even more difficult,” Barker recalls. “He was spending a lot of time with her, and then coming back and staying with us when we needed him. I resented him, for the obvious reasons.”
He continues: “There wasn’t that one stable foundation to go to and be like, ‘Yo, this is difficult for me.’”
Mentions of Travis Barker’s Past Relationships
Barker briefly mentions his first marriage to Melissa Kennedy, whom he was with from 2001 to 2002.
“I was touring with Blink-182 nonstop. It was tough. Especially since I was married at the time,” he notes. “I kind of realized that the relationship wasn’t working for either of us anymore. I remember we had gotten into a huge blowout and she had said something to me like, ‘You know what? Why don’t you go back to L.A. and go do your thing out there.’ I went back to L.A. soon after that — and life just kept getting crazier.”
Shanna Moakler appears on camera to talk about their marriage, which lasted from 2004 to 2008. Barker admits he was “constantly partying” when he initially met Moakler, now 51.
The documentary features archival footage pulled from the former couple’s reality show, Meet the Barkers. Their kids — son Landon, 22, daughter Alabama, 20, and Moakler’s daughter Atiana, 27, whom she shares with Oscar De La Hoya — also make prominent appearances.
“The year Blink-182 broke up, I had just bought a house in a nice community because we were having kids. But balancing home life and touring, our relationship was getting more and more challenging,” Barker explains. “And divorce came soon after. My marriage fell apart. My band fell apart. It felt like my whole world was falling apart.”
Addressing His Drug Use
“My friends knew how much I dreaded being on planes and one of them gave me a pill to help with my anxiety,” Barker recalls. “It started off really mellow in the beginning — one or two pills — before we went on a flight. But things didn’t stop there at all.”
Barker describes how his substance abuse issues escalated, adding, “It went from taking painkillers before we go on a flight to actually having to be on them, or I couldn’t even function.”
According to Moakler, Barker admitted he took “about 20 to 30 pills a day” at the height of his addiction.
“I would take Oxycodone to the point where I felt like I was melting,” Barker continues. “I was self-medicating because I was having to fly almost every day and be away from my kids. I was taking so many pills that I had a security guard whose only job was to watch me sleep and make sure I was still breathing.”
He says: “I started thinking I might be hitting a place where I needed to go to rehab. There was this huge desire to just quit everything.”
Elsewhere in the doc, Barker refers to himself as being a “functioning addict” during his battle.
The Plane Crash
In 2008, Barker was in a plane crash that killed four of the six people on board. Barker and his friend Adam “DJ AM” Goldstein were the only two survivors.
Barker recalls in the doc how he and daughter Alabama both had concerns before he boarded the plane. He also goes into detail about catching fire amid the terrifying crash.
“The plane attempts to take off to go in the air and then we’d go down, go in the air and go down. We end up hitting an embankment and it was just fire and chaos everywhere,” Barker says. “I couldn’t go in front of me. So I went to the side of me.”
He adds: “I tried to make my way in front but the lower parts of my arms caught fire. I went to the emergency exit and I opened it. I jumped out right into the jet where all the fuel is. Then my whole body caught on fire. I’m running, and the fire just won’t go out. Maybe 10 seconds later, the plane blows up.”
The Aftermath of the Crash
Following the accident, the drummer suffered third-degree burns on 65 percent of his body and needed 27 surgeries. After spending three months in the hospital, Barker had to learn to walk again.
“My brain really wasn’t functioning. I was on morphine, and I was on all sorts of medicine, so I didn’t even really understand the severity of it all. I broke all of my ribs, fractured my back in four different places and they couldn’t do any more surgeries and I was low on blood,” Barker shares. “And then there was talk of amputating my foot.”
Barker notes that he was already smoking, drinking and taking Vicodin at the time of the incident.
“I was in a lot of pain. They couldn’t get my pain management right, so I was freaking out,” he adds. “I was basically on the same drugs I was on every day, so I could feel everything. It was all a blur.”
While hospitalized, Barker experienced suicidal ideation, saying, “I was handling that miserably. I was suicidal when I was in the hospital. … [I told people], ‘I’ll transfer any amount of money, just f***ing kill me.’” (If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at https://988lifeline.org/)
Adam ‘DJ AM’ Goldstein’s Death
Amid Barker’s lengthy recovery, Goldstein was discharged from the hospital after one month. He kept touring — and flying on planes — but expressed concerns about a possible relapse. Goldstein’s loved ones were planning an intervention, but he was found dead in 2009 at age 36 due to a drug overdose.
Travis Barker’s Relationship With His Kids
After returning home, Barker focused on sobriety for his kids’ sake. He says in the doc that he “never wanted to feel as high” as he did in the hospital.
Barker still struggled with trauma from the crash, which led to him refusing to be apart from Alabama and Landon. His children explain that Barker’s fears caused them to worry about flying as well.
Travis Barker’s Relationship With Kourtney Kardashian
Kardashian, who has been married to Barker since 2021, describes her husband as being “very gentle and quiet” when they met. Six months into their relationship, Kardashian, now 47, found out she was pregnant.
The couple were expecting a girl — who they were going to name Tulip — before Kardashian learned during a doctor’s appointment at the three-month mark that their baby no longer had a heartbeat.
“When we lost the baby, we were devastated,” Kardashian says in the documentary. “We cried for days. All we wanted was to have a baby together.”
The reality star recalls the pair’s continued efforts to conceive, which included five IVF attempts in eight months. They ultimately decided to press pause on the process before their son, Rocky, was conceived naturally.
Kardashian and Barker welcomed their son in November 2023. She also shares kids Mason, 16, Penelope, 13, and Reign, 11, with ex Scott Disick.
