As people live longer and birth rates decline, the US population is aging rapidly.
Ten percent of all US adults say they are a caregiver for a parent age 65 or older, with older adults projected to account for nearly 23% of Americans by 2050.
Confronting the realities of aging parents and loved ones can be challenging, but experts say the sooner families start preparing, the better.
According to Dr. Anita Chandra, a geriatric specialist who provides medical care for patients aged 65 and older, families who seem to navigate aging most smoothly aren’t always the healthiest or the wealthiest.
“More often, they’re the ones who started preparing before they had to,” she wrote on Instagram.
While preparation may not prevent illness, it does make the hardest moments a little less overwhelming, she explained. Here are six ways to begin laying the groundwork for a smoother aging journey.
1. They pay attention to function
Maintaining functionality in old age means preserving the physical and mental abilities needed to live independently, stay mobile and enjoy a high quality of life.
Can your loved one still do the things that matter to them? According to the World Health Organization, this includes their ability to:
- Meet their basic needs
- Learn, grow and make decisions
- Be mobile
- Build and maintain relationships
- Contribute to society
“Function predicts independence better than age alone,” said Dr. Chandra. Prepared families “notice changes in function instead of assuming everything is ‘just old age.’”
2. They have conversations early
It’s not just paperwork: Dr. Chandra advises families to talk about practical tasks and topics like driving and living alone.
More than 16 million Americans aged 65 and older (nearly 1 in 3) are living alone — a historic number compared to 1950, when it was just 1 in 10.
Aging in place requires careful consideration and planning, accounting for physical safety, health, nutrition, social connection and well-being. There are also the matters of the soul and spirit, like discussing what makes life worth living and what kind of help feels acceptable.
“These conversations are easier before there’s a crisis,” said Dr. Chandra.
3. They stay curious
Staying curious about changes in an older loved one helps families catch early signs of health, mood or cognitive shifts before they become urgent problems. Dr. Chandra says the small changes over time often tell us the most.
Changes to watch for include:
- Sudden weight changes
- Declining social invitations
- Changes in how much they eat
- Household items left in odd places
- Spoiled food in the fridge
- Rapid mood swings.
Rather than accusing them or immediately jumping into problem-solving mode, inquire warmly about how they spend their days and how they’re feeling and let them share their full experience first.
As for determining the root cause, tracking details of the changes, including how often they happen and any physical symptoms like confusion or pain, can help a physician.
4. They know the medications
Knowing a loved one’s medication list isn’t about micromanaging.
Hospitalization rates due to adverse drug effects are four to seven times higher in older patients than in younger one, most commonly due to anticoagulants, antibiotics, diabetes agents, opioid analgesics and antipsychotics.
But while medication problems are one of the most common causes of hospitalization, they’re also one of the most “fixable,” Dr. Chandra pointed out.
Maintaining an updated medication list, conducting regular medication reviews, watching for warning signs — like sudden confusion, excessive drowsiness or falls — and simplifying the routine with pill organizers or automated dispensers can help address medication-related problems and prevent hospitalization.
5. They support independence
Providing care doesn’t have to mean making a loved one completely dependent. In fact, the latter may do more harm than good, despite the best intentions.
“Doing everything for someone can unintentionally speed functional decline,” warned Dr. Chandra. “The goal isn’t doing more. It’s helping them safely do as much as possible themselves.”
Your future self will be grateful you did, she added.
