In 2024, a tech bro predicted that “AI girlfriends” would create a $1 billion business — and it seems that youth are busy building on that dark prophecy.
New research suggests Generation Alpha boys would rather have a robo-girlfriend than risk rejection and the formative challenges of an IRL relationship.
The study, conducted by Male Allies UK, surveyed 1,000 boys aged 12 to 16 and found that a hefty 85% of them have spoken to a chatbot, 20% know a peer who is “dating” an AI chatbot, and over a quarter prefer the attention and connection of a bot partner to a real, human-to-human relationship.
More than half — 58% — said AI relationships are easier because they can “control the conversation.”
As disconcerting as the research is, experts say the appeal of AI relationships, which offer ceaseless response and zero rejection, is clear.
“AI validates, affirms, never tires, never pushes back. For an adolescent boy still assembling a sense of self, that kind of frictionless attention can feel like intimacy,” Nicholas Velotta, head of relationship research at Arya, told The Post.
Velotta points to the clear lure of AI for Gen Alpha guys, a demographic navigating two conflicting cultural narratives about masculine identity.
“On one side, they’re told that to be a man is to dominate, to “looksmaxx,” to project an alpha status. On the other hand, they’re told that men are the architects of most of what’s gone wrong in our gender dynamics, and that the appropriate response is to sit down, be quiet, and make space.”
According to Velotta, AI offers a sense of safety for young men trying to reconcile and define themselves within these impossible extremes.
“It is not hard to understand why a young man finds comfort in a technology specifically engineered to welcome him, never judge him, and appear to understand him, especially when the human voices in his life are either demanding something impossible or dismissing him entirely,” he said.
A May 2025 study found that a startling 52% of adolescents nationwide use chatbots at least once a month for social purposes, including practicing conversation starters, expressing emotions, giving advice, resolving conflicts, navigating romantic interactions, and self-advocacy.
The draw is amplified for boys, who have historically been given fewer tools for verbal intimacy and emotional expression than girls.
To that end, according to Velotta, AI has therapeutic potential when used with intention and clear boundaries — in support of, rather than as a substitute for, a relationship.
“AI is not a person. It is a sophisticated pattern-matching system calibrated to keep you engaged, and if a boy grows up believing otherwise, he is being set up for a particular kind of loneliness,” he said.
Velotta notes that teen behavior is reflected in their adult counterparts: a 2024 survey from Infobip found that nearly 20% of Americans have flirted with chatbots, while conversely — and concerningly — over 45% of Gen Z men have reportedly never asked a woman out in real life.
“Asking someone out is a charged act. The stakes are high, and the risk of misreading a situation feels consequential,” Velotta explained. “We want boys to be more thoughtful and intentional, but thoughtfulness requires practice, and practice requires risk.”
Assuming that risk and participating in real-life relationships teaches essential skills like negotiation, empathy, conflict resolution and social fluency, he said — all prerequisites for a healthy, fulfilling adult life.
“Real relationships are hard. Awkward. Occasionally humiliating. They require you to sit inside someone else’s reality and be genuinely changed by it. The capacity for real encounter, for surviving disappointment, for being surprised by another person, doesn’t develop without friction,” said Velotta.
He maintains that removing that friction with an AI yes-bot amounts to arrested development and a grim prognosis for these boys who shall soon be men.
“A generation that skips that formation doesn’t just struggle to love well. It struggles to work, collaborate, and tolerate being told no.”
