Hilaria Baldwin detailed the ins and outs of her marriage to husband Alec Baldwin in her newly released memoir, Manual Not Included.
The book — released on Tuesday, May 6 — made it clear within the first few pages that Hilaria, 41, “wasn’t a gold digger,” which she’ then dedicated quite a few pages of the memoir proving. Hilaria was 27 to Alec’s 53 when they first met.
“It wasn’t purely about physical attraction; it was true respect,” she wrote about their romance. “No one had ever wanted to get to know me in quite that way before.”
The couple got married in 2012 and have since welcomed seven kids together: Carmen, 11, Rafael, 9, Leonardo, 8, Romeo, 6, Eduardo, 4, María Lucía, 4, and Ilaria, 2. (Alec is also the father to 29-year-old Ireland, whom he shares with his ex Kim Basinger.)
“I have given a lot of thought to why people want to try to label me [a gold digger], because I’ve lived with these attacks for a while now,” she wrote. “If you are a successful gold digger, you have one kid, spend a few years with your husband, then get out of the marriage and take his money. … I can tell you that seven kids shouldn’t be in the gold-digging curriculum, and I would probably receive a solid D– for this choice. Kids are expensive and a lot of hard work.”
Keep scrolling for Hilaria’s quotes about Alec in Manual Not Included:
How He Courted Her
The “first six weeks” of their relationship consisted solely of conversations between Alec and Hilaria.
“He would shake my hand hello and goodbye,” she recalled. “As much as I found humor in his old-fashioned dating style, I also found it refreshing and completely different from what I was used to.”
Hilaria wrote that she was able to “relax” her dating fears during the early days of their courtship.
“He made it clear and he showed up. I allowed myself to let go of my insecurity — let go of my fear of heartbreak and the uncertainty of the future. I leaned in. We both did,” she wrote. “People often look at our age difference as weird or a negative — sometimes we do too! — but I feel that one of the huge benefits is that the older we get, the more we are aware of how precious life is.”
Changing Alec’s Life
Hilaria wrote that she got credit for Alec’s lifestyle changes — and explained why that is not true. Early in their relationship, Alec was told he was prediabetic. Hilaria “made lists of foods to eat and not eat” and “started to feel much better” after she worked with him.
“Alec committed to healthier eating,” she wrote. “He made that choice: it wasn’t me. I was a good partner to him — I never shamed him, only encouraged him.”
Learning About Alec During a Valentine’s Day Mishap
When Valentine’s Day came around, Hilaria did not get Alec a card, which he was expecting.
“I was getting a lot of information about my boyfriend. It was a real look into Alec Baldwin,” she shared. “He’s romantic, he’s emotional — even needy at times. He tells you exactly what it is that he needs and exactly when he needs it.”
Their Proposal
Hilaria picked out her own engagement ring because “he wanted me to have the ring I wanted,” she wrote, noting that the proposal was not a surprise since Alec is “terrible at keeping secrets.” (He proposed at the Montauk Point Lighthouse in April 2012.)
Nearly Getting Divorced
The “rockiest” year of their marriage came after the birth of their first two children, Carmen and Rafa.
“I was so focused on how I thought things should be, and Alec was so set in his ways. Neither one of us would budge. I took my rings off as a sign that I was potentially ready to walk,” she wrote. “Entering into a relationship as cement blocks will end in divorce, and that was where we were heading. We had to warm up and melt our solid selves, be willing to look within and see how we could do better.”
They got through the rough patch and renewed their vows on their five-year wedding anniversary.
The ‘Rust’ Tragedy
Hilaria detailed her point of view of the events that occurred in October 2021, when Rust cinematographer Halyna Hutchins was killed on the film’s set. (Alec was holding the prop gun when it fired. He was charged twice with involuntary manslaughter, but both cases were later dismissed.)
“Have you ever ignored a call coming in from your husband? I did on October 21, 2021—actually, it was two calls,” Hilaria wrote. “He then texted me to call him right away and all of a sudden, my heart and my stomach smashed together: Something must have happened. This conversation—and this entire day—was full of confusion, disbelief, pain, nausea, anger, fear, and heartache as the realization of what had occurred became clear over the course of many hours.”
Hilaria noted that she omitted a “play-by-play of this day,” but she told Alec: “I will be here with you. I love you,” following the incident.
Manual Not Included is out now.
